There are some people on Twitter that consistently bring the funny. Personally, I could use some lessons from them. I can hardly get my own friends to appreciate what I have to say, let alone thousands of strangers.These tweets will definitely bring a smile to your face.
1. I mean, sure, eating a box of cookies usually either means that you are chowing down on feelings or have no self-control.
However, sometimes, you just have to own it. Eat your favorite box of cookies and relish in the fact that you can.
2. Foot odor is one of those things that my nose just can’t handle.
Having this happen would be worse than the scariest horror movie plot for me. The worst part is that bad foot odor seems to run in my family.
3. There is something so cute and innocent about doodles from a child.
I’m ashamed to admit that at 27-years-old, my drawing skills are a lot worse than that. I’m also curious as to why the cat didn’t take off.
4. This would probably be worse than Bambi.
I don’t think that even Disney can put a positive spin on a turkey’s life. They better not come across this tweet — otherwise, they might use it as an idea when they run out of remakes. Nothing is safe.
5. Yes, I said, “Nothing is safe,” and that includes relationships.
However, there is the right combination of ice cream and a Dr. Phil episode to make everyone feel better about their situation. Anything made of chocolate works wonders. Best of luck finding your perfect combo!
6. You could say that you’re resourceful here.
Using bread as an oven mitt is definitely thinking outside the box. I wonder how well it worked. Did you eat it after? I would!
7. This tweet speaks to me.
I mean, you don’t have to worry about the five-second rule if nothing fell on the floor. Why let the good food go to waste?
8. I can’t help but live for sweater weather and anything pumpkin-related.
Plus, you can slow down on the shaving schedule. The earlier autumn is recognized, the better it is for everyone! You will see.
9. We all have that friend who has a mind dirtier than a used dishcloth.
Don’t forget to appreciate your innocent and angelic friends, as well. They bring the balance we need.
10. This is too relatable for words.
I don’t know what happens when I sleep, but when I wake up, I look like a member of Cirque du Soleil. No, thanks!
11. I don’t know why they turned something so morbid into a children’s rhyme.
I hope her therapy bill wasn’t too large after that discovery. Why does everything end up getting ruined?
12. I know everyone has to start somewhere, but this is the kind of thing I have nightmares about.
Don’t ask me why. Also, I bet this guy is a dad.
13. Knowing how forgetful guys can be, this would probably save a lot of wedding disasters from happening.
They would make a killing. I would invest in it if I had the money.
14. I’m pretty sure he’s a pickier eater than I am.
Personally, I’m just happy with whatever sort of food I get. I could never yell at someone for not making it fancy enough.
15. I wouldn’t recognize him with ID.
The image of Tony Hawk that’s in my head right now this is the man on the cover of the Tony Hawk Pro Skater video game.
16. Hunger makes you do some crazy things.
I hope I would never forget my other two wishes. What about a castle? A dream vacation? A boyfriend, so my parents will leave me alone?